Yesterday Buboy and I went to attend the dedication of Kian, Allan and Susan’s baby. Allan is one of Buboy’s friends from college. I was excited to go, not only because Allan has been a good friend of mine too, but because his baby was so cute the last we saw him at Francis’ baby’s christening last year.
We arrived at the venue a little early and went outside to wait. Then Ritchie and Sherrie came and we girls chatted while the boys did the same in the other corner. After a few how are you’s, Sherrie broke the news that she’s already 4 months pregnant. I got really excited and happy for her and I know she actually saw it. Then Nhey and Arlyn came with their daughter Julliene. I noticed that Arlyn is getting bigger and I was later informed that she’s 5 months pregnant with their 2nd baby. I was still okay that time and still happy for the two moms sitting beside me. However, when we were all seated down inside and the ninongs were called to seat in front that I began to feel depressed. Nhey said he’s not a ninong because Allan is already the ninong of their first child and according to superstitions it’s not good. It dawned on me that Buboy is the ninong of all his closest friends from college’s first child. Who will he get to be the ninong when we finally have our baby?
Then during the dedication ceremony, Allan and Susan offered a prayer and they said something like thank you Lord for entrusting us to nurture a life. Big time sadness hits me again. I wonder why God would not trust me to nurture another life. Can’t I do it? Tears started to line my eyes. It hurt so much to push them back so no one would notice. We ended up going earlier than the rest of Buboy’s friends.
I thought I was over this. I thought I have already accepted that God might have other plans for us. I thought wrong...
-chebong
We arrived at the venue a little early and went outside to wait. Then Ritchie and Sherrie came and we girls chatted while the boys did the same in the other corner. After a few how are you’s, Sherrie broke the news that she’s already 4 months pregnant. I got really excited and happy for her and I know she actually saw it. Then Nhey and Arlyn came with their daughter Julliene. I noticed that Arlyn is getting bigger and I was later informed that she’s 5 months pregnant with their 2nd baby. I was still okay that time and still happy for the two moms sitting beside me. However, when we were all seated down inside and the ninongs were called to seat in front that I began to feel depressed. Nhey said he’s not a ninong because Allan is already the ninong of their first child and according to superstitions it’s not good. It dawned on me that Buboy is the ninong of all his closest friends from college’s first child. Who will he get to be the ninong when we finally have our baby?
Then during the dedication ceremony, Allan and Susan offered a prayer and they said something like thank you Lord for entrusting us to nurture a life. Big time sadness hits me again. I wonder why God would not trust me to nurture another life. Can’t I do it? Tears started to line my eyes. It hurt so much to push them back so no one would notice. We ended up going earlier than the rest of Buboy’s friends.
I thought I was over this. I thought I have already accepted that God might have other plans for us. I thought wrong...
-chebong
No comments:
Post a Comment